Good For What Ailes Ya
Fox News' parent company settled Gretchen Carlson's lawsuit against Roger Ailes for $20 million this week. Carlson was a Fox News anchor for eleven years, and experienced consistent sexual harassment from Fox founder, ex-CEO and chairman Roger Ailes. She also recorded "between 6 and 10" meetings with Ailes where he made inappropriate, demeaning comments about having sex with her. Initially there was talk of Ailes paying a part of Carlson's settlement, but since then, Ailes' lawyer Susan Estrich has stated, "Mr. Ailes is not contributing anything." Estrich continued, "...To the world, to his marriage, nothing. He's just a wrinkly old baked potato with a penchant for evil and a constant hard on."
Stanford University rapist Brock Turner was released from less than three months of prison this week, and returned to his home state of Ohio to register as a sex offender. Turner was a university student and swimmer, who had sexually assaulted an unconscious girl on campus (as seen in an earlier 'This Week'). His case gained national notoriety when the victim's letter to him went viral, and he was only given a six-month long sentencing, though he was supposed to be facing 14 years. It was also later discovered by NBC News that his "jail time" turned out to be just a three month long pony ride.
This week, The World Health Organization made a public advisory that travelers returning home from Zika virus-concentrated areas should either use condoms or abstain from sex for six months. The WHO said the advice applies to all travelers, not just people who exhibit Zika symptoms. Wyoming is the only US state that hasn't reported any cases of the Zika virus, so the WHO recommended that you head there if you just got back from Brazil and you really need to bareback that convenient store clerk from yesterday.
India's culture minister Mahesh Sharma made a public statement this week, telling female travelers not to wear skirts when visiting India, so they won't be sexually assaulted. Sharms told reporters that visitors are given a "Do's and Don'ts" card when they arrive at an Indian airport; "Like what to do and what no to do. Small things. We tell them that: Don't venture out alone at night, don't wear skirts." He continued, "Also, we don't like it when women have thoughts, opinions, or bangs. And no one is allowed in the country with 'the Rachel' haircut."
Michigan State University published a study this week, that found that older women gain health benefits from having frequent, fulfilling sex, while older men don't. The study showed that older women found lower blood pressure and no negative side effects from frequent sex, while men between the ages of 57 and 85 were more than twice as likely to have a heart attack if they engaged in sex at least once a week. The study's leader, Hui Liu, said that men who have sex too often or too enjoyably are at a higher risk of heart complications. Liu recommended that men have 5 minutes of methodical starfish sex every Tuesday, followed by a glass of tepid milk with a Today Show segment.